Breaking: Islamic Councils Demand Halal Certified Capsicum Spray

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5678In an amazing development, already violent protestors demanding that infidels who criticise Islam be beheaded turned the violence up a notch when the police had to use capsicum spray to subdue them. A protester was heard to shout “It’s not Halal Certified” which sent the mob into an absolute fury.

Islamic Council leaders immediately contacted the Prime Minister, via their direct line, and demanded a meeting. The Prime Minister was quick to leave the meeting discussing Australia’s budget position to talk to the Islamic leaders. Malcolm Turnbull said we must do everything we can to improve social cohesion and this is a reasonable demand.

The Prime Minister went on to say that he will contact Mr El-Mouthy of the Halal Authority Australia, as he has heard his wife is running out of shoes.

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